Thursday, February 18, 2010

Life without glasses


So far, this year has been the worst New Year of my life. Out of the 49 days since 2010 began, exactly five of them have been what I would call "okay". The rest have sucked. Trying to stumble around with my lopsided eyes for the last 44 days has presented me with the worst bucket of no fun I've ever received. My grizzly bear tendencies are taking over my life. Of course, Hampton and Elly always thought that was true, but even I'm beginning to believe it now. If I don't get my new glasses, like SOON, I'm going on a murder spree. First on the "to-go" list is the ophthalmologist, who assured me this would all be a walk in the park. Next comes the optometrist who's taking his sweet time making my new glasses. Then, I'll visit the place where glasses are made and light my own special fire under their asses. After that, nothing remains except to sit down, shut up, have another drink, and hope this totally shitty episode of my life ends before my mind walks.

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